Lights, camera, and explosions!
These three little words are all that’s needed to sum up the 1980s and 1990s action flick films that my teenage years were made up of. It consisted of muscle men who had witty one-liners with bad accents – Sylvester Stallone, Arnold Schwarzenegger and the one man who lost his virginity before his dad did: Chuck Norris.
Oh, you don’t believe me?
Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
Chuck Norris uses ribbed condoms inside out, so he gets the pleasure.
When Chuck Norris has sex with a man, it won’t be because he is gay. It will be because he has run out of women.
Okay, I need to stop. But if you don’t want to – there are hundreds more Chuck Norris jokes here.
But long gone are the male chauvinist, steroid poster child, misogynist action stars? Or are they?
Magnetic Theatre presents starting Action Movie: The Play which has its Asheville theatrical debut on Friday, 8 March. This ambitious production aims to stage all the elements of what made classic action movies fun, titillating, and “slow-walk-away-from-explosion’ great.
I met with the cast and crew as they were practicing their death-defying stunts and recorded a podcast talking about what is in store for the audience.
Director Andrew Gall explained that this will be Magnetic Theatre’s most ambitious production yet. The play was written by his counterparts in Chicago, Joe Faust and Richard Ragsdale.
“There will be a car chase,” Andrew began and I stopped him mid-sentence.
“What?! How can there be a car chase?” I blurted out.
“ACTION MOVIE: THE PLAY” opens Friday, March 8 and runs through Sunday, March 31 at The Magnetic Theatre, 375 Depot St. in the River Arts District. Performances are Fridays and Saturdays at 7:30 p.m. and Sundays at 3 p.m. Tickets are $18 and $10 for students. Purchase your tickets here.